It’s no secret that after a long time with the same person, a relationship can start to feel stagnant. The “honeymoon phase” of those first few months together is over and you’re staring at the reality of everyday life. Maybe you’ve been together for two years or for twenty, but there are still plenty of ways to keep your relationship fresh and new. Just because you think you know everything there is to know about this person, doesn’t mean you can’t still work on creating important memories and special moments.
Don’t let the monotony of daily activities get in the way of your passion for each other. Loving someone may be easy most days, but sometimes it takes that extra bit of effort to actually still like them. Maintain open communication and a willingness to try new things. Relationships are also all about compromise, so be open to adapting to your partner’s needs. Overall, the best way to keep love alive and fresh is to commit to working on it.
1. Setting Goals
If you are starting to feel like your relationship is becoming boring, you may need to set some relationship goals to actually work toward change. Unlike the popular hashtag describing a picture of you and your significant jamming out on some dive bar karaoke, relationship goals should be taken seriously. By setting goals, and working to maintain them, you prove to your partner that you are putting them first. These steps can often be relatively simple. Something like making sure to text your partner once every day to let them know you are thinking about them can go a long way.
Another important part of a relationship is support. You two should operate as a team to lift each other up. This means setting goals for each other and striving to maintain them together. Maybe your partner is working hard on their RN to BSN degree program and really needs your help for long nights in the library. Even if you can’t spend time together, the support will be a different way to make you even stronger. It’s simply another way to prioritize your partner and remind them how much you love them.
2. Be Adventurous
Often, relationships lose their spark when you become complacent or when you’re too preoccupied to dedicate time to one another. Go have an adventure where you can leave your stress behind and focus on each other. On spring break from automotive & diesel technology college, go somewhere fun rather than staying home and studying! A quick weekend getaway or a full-blown vacation to surf Hawaii may be just what the doctor ordered.
While there are proven reasons this can improve your relationship, you should also be aware that it isn’t a complete fix every time. For example, if the relationship is strained or there is extra tension between you, going away together may not be the best solution. However, if you are simply looking to regain some intimacy and make some new, exciting memories, then a trip away should be perfect.
Take the opportunity to explore parts of yourself and your partner that you haven’t seen before. Do things that scare you, like skydiving or horseback riding. Or explore a place you’ve never been and experience North Bend, OR without an initial plan and see where the wind takes you. With your person by your side, you’ll be able to conquer anything, together.
3. Spice Up Your Sex Life
One of the major reasons couples start to feel distance from each other is a lack of intimacy. In some cases, this can simply mean you need more time cuddling on the couch or holding hands in the movie theatre. In many cases, this means you need to spice up your sex life. Sex is a natural connection between two people in a relationship, and if it isn’t a constant then you can start to feel angry and tense. With our busy worlds, it can be difficult to maintain a regular sex schedule.
Be open in the bedroom. Constantly communicate with your partner about what you want and need from them sexually. You may even want to explore some different activities with each other. You’ve committed to being adventurous, so continue that into the bedroom. Most couples who maintain a healthy sex life are happier and less on edge around each other. Period.
4. Open Communication
Just as with sex, communicating with your partner is key in every aspect of your relationship. If you feel like something isn’t quite falling into place, communicate that with your other half. There should be no judgment between the two of you, so feel free to express your concerns and your triumphs.
Another trap of long-term relationships can be taking the other person for granted. When you’ve been with someone for a long time, you can start to lose sight of what drew you to them in the first place. Maybe consider spicing up the way you communicate. When was the last time you put away all of your distractions and actually listened to your partner? If you can’t remember, then it has been too long.
Find times to actually talk and hear what each other has to say. It can be about either or your feelings or about the latest episode of Game of Thrones. Either way, making sure you’re always valuing each other’s thoughts and opinions goes a very long way.
5. Remember the Love
All of these tips and tricks are just simple ways to remind you of your love for one another. No, you may not be still in that initial bubble where everything is great and you’re so in love. You’re going to fight. You’re going to find things about that other person that drive you insane. going to feel frustrated and alone at times. But don’t let all of that negativity distract from the reason you fell in love in the first place. Because, at the end of the day, that love is all you need to keep going. Remembering this fact is the easiest way to spice up your relationship.