I’ve never been one for health trends, but to be fair that’s because I have never been one for being healthy. I hate vegetables, fruit is okay, and working out only got fun a couple years ago when I got fatter from beer weight (which is actually bullshit because I never gained weight before I met beer!). That said, I’m trying to eat healthier right now because, well, I’m realizing what being unhealthy is doing to my body. However, sometimes when you’re online and looking up health information you find these weird trends that are so stupid you want to pull your hair out. Health trends are dumb and weird and stupid and here’s a few of the worst.
I’m mad that this exists. A coffee enema is actually exactly what it sounds like: a colon cleanse with coffee. I’m all down with alternative and natural medicine, but putting coffee up your ass is is the most abstract stupid idea I’ve ever heard of. Granted, it came from German physicians trying to find a cure for cancer. But it doesn’t cure cancer, and it could possibly hurt you, so what’s the point? It apparently increases energy… but so does drinking coffee, not butt chugging it!
Apparently, charcoal is used by hospitals to get poison and booze out of people’s systems. That’s great, but the idea of using charcoal yourself is still weird to me. Maybe I need to grow up and adapt though, because this actually seems like it works. According to Men’s Fitness, charcoal reduces the body’s absorption of poison by a whopping 47 percent. I still can’t imagine drinking/consuming charcoal at all but, looking over these lists, this is one of the weirdest health trends I’ve seen with some kind of data backing it.
WTF. This is seriously disgusting. This article begins with “Once considered the domain of hippies and ancient civilizations…” and all I can think of is “of course those damn hippies did something weird like this!” Apparently it’s good for vitamins or something if you’re a recent mother, but this hasn’t been proven. Besides can you imagine how someone would market this? “For soccer moms who just can’t get enough of -” I can’t even think about it.
I don’t know why I’m surprised after writing about placenta pills and coffee enemas. These people actually think a ring helps you lose weight. This is even more infuriating and mind blowing than coffee enemas. There is nothing about putting a ring around your finger that makes you lose weight, or helps in any way. Also, you look stupid.
What dumb things have you done to be healthy? Let me know on Twitter @Robolitious.